Saturday Faturday

wine

As if getting drunk on Friday night doesn’t have enough calories – enter Saturday Faturday: I am hungover and I will eat everything.

I’ve figured out hacks, tips and tricks for just about everything, but the one thing I haven’t quite figured out is how to deal with alcohol and its after effects.

When I’m drunk, or even tipsy, I must eat or I will die.
And when I’m hungover, I need to eat carby and fatty foods all day or else my hangover will never end.

Here is a list of things I ate today. (Keep in mind, it’s not even 1 PM):

  • 2 bagels
  • 1 cheeseburger
  • 1 lindt chocolate truffle
  • a few handfuls of caramel popcorn
  • (I currently have a sweet potato roasting in the oven)

How do you deal with incorporating alcohol into your life? 

For me, “just one drink” isn’t the answer. One drink is more than enough to get me drunk. Sadly, I’m a lightweight.

While losing weight, I try to avoid alcohol altogether. While maintaining, I drink but not often.

I suppose I could continue to eat carby and fatty foods, but rather than choosing a breakfast consisting of two bagels and cheeseburger, I could choose a healthier option. Maybe a nice wrap with avocado and some meat and nuts.

Or! I could just lay down on the couch all day while eating cheesefries. Hmm…

unspecified-7

If you love Fat Girls Fitness, subscribe to our bi-weekly newsletter.

(We won’t spam you)

And/or follow Fat Girls Fitness on Facebook 🙂

How to Find Good Food

Yesterday I wrote a post about decent fast food options. I know I know, I totally suck at Fitness.

b3a10abef396f68423bc6a60d2bbf40cb78298afa309f51c76c94130124b681c.jpg

If you’ll find it in your heart to forgive me, I’ll do my best to restore some balance to the universe with this post.

How? By sharing a really awesome website I came across yesterday. It’s called EatWellGuide.org.

Screenshot 2016-03-11 09.54.29.png

EatWellGuide.org landing page

The premise: EatWellGuide.org helps you locate local healthy options. All you do is put in your Zip Code, town, or City.

Why I like It: 

  • I’ve been struggling to find a local Farmer’s Market. Even though I live just outside the city, I live just outside the city. So it’s a schlep to buy food there and bring it over on pubic transport.
  • It’s easier to use than Google Maps because the search is narrower.

Potential Downfall:

  • It seems like it may be focused on certain geographical areas, but I’m not 100% sure.
  • Try it out and see if it works for you!

unspecified-7

If you love Fat Girls Fitness, subscribe to our bi-weekly newsletter.

(We won’t spam you)

And/or follow Fat Girls Fitness on Facebook 🙂

Fast Food Decency

 

ef6de7efb71df48a178d7836c7ef58a4

“I can barely taste the difference”

My mantra = eat. real. food. But sometimes, real food isn’t there. And other times, you have your period. So you really just want to have fast food.

My problem with fast food, more than anything, is the industry’s general treatment of animals. I don’t go overboard, but I try to minimize my support of fast food restaurants for that reason alone. Emphasis on “try.”

Of course, there are obvious health hazards related to eating fast food regularly. But of course health matters vary based on your personal circumstances and level of activity. The occasional fast food meal won’t make or break you.

In any event, sometimes fast food is what’s there. Here are a few decent options.

McDonald’s: South West Chicken Salad

Remember those gross salad shakers McDonald’s use to have?

mcd2.png

What on earth were they thinking?

Those days are long gone, my friends. The Southwest Chicken Salad is actually super delicious and yummy. It has mixed greens, chicken, beans, cheese and some little tortilla chips. The ingredients are reliably fresh, at least in my experience.

It’s also really cheap, as far as salads go in New York, around 5 – 7$ depending on the location. As a comparison, a lunch salad in the city is usually around $12-15 dollars.

McDonalds: Vanilla Cone

The McDonald’s Vanilla Cone is truly a hidden gem. It’s nothing less than a tragedy how few people know of its existence.

Dude, this stuff looks and tastes like ice cream. But it only has 170 calories. And 5G of protein. It’s not a bad choice – I have it quite often.

Plus – it’s like .99 cents. Some locations even have an extra small size. Ask for a “kid’s cone.”

IMG_5235.JPG

“Can I have a Kid’s Cone please? But make it for 28 year olds.” 

Wendy’s:  Chili + Baked Potato or Side Salad

Some of the best moments of my life were moments I spent eating Wendy’s chili. Depressing? Yes. True? Very.

If it weren’t for Wendy’s Chili, I’d never have any excuse to eat saltines. And I love saltines very much.

I usually get my Chili with a baked potato + sour cream and chives. Alternatively, I get the caesar side salad, and dump the chili on top of it.

Wendy’s: Everything You Actually Want, But in a Tiny Version

If you happen to find yourself at Wendy’s, and you actually want the real stuff, you’re in luck. Wendy’s has itsy bitsy versions of quite a few menu items.

Just ask for the “value size.” And yes, they have tiny Frosty’s too.

Bonus Sauce: Even though your fries and nugs are now tiny, the BBQ sauce stays the same size.

FullSizeRender.jpg

No, this soda is not enormous. 

Burger King: Ceasar Salad

Burger King’s salad is not nearly as good as McDonald’s, but at least the ingredients have appeared fresh in my experience. And it isn’t gross. At the very least it’s better than getting a Whopper.

Taco Bell: Fresco Menu

Taco Bell has a light menu, called the “Fresco Menu.” These are decent choices, calorie-wise. In fact, pretty much any soft taco is a decent option. The Bell also has rice in a styrofoam cup. #epitomeofclass

Slapclap_tacobell.jpg

“I’ll have one of everything, please. Actually, make that two.”

A word of caution: these items are not exactly filling.

I find that the Cheesy Fiesta Potatoes are far more suited to my tastes. Not terrible. 270 calories. Could be worse – I could be eating an entire antelope followed by a jar of Nutella.

Any Suggestions?

These are just a few decent fast food options – I’m sure there are many more out there.

I’d love to hear your recommendations.

…Together, we can make sure that no fast food item will ever go uneaten.

unspecified-7

If you love Fat Girls Fitness, subscribe to our bi-weekly newsletter.

(We won’t spam you)

And/or follow Fat Girls Fitness on Facebook 🙂

Coconut Oil Coffee

Fotolia_69787341_XS.jpg

Holy crap. My Cousin Diana is on fire.

Yesterday, I posted a recipe she texted me a little while back – Spaghetti Squash a la Cousin Diana.

IMG_3376

Admittedly, I haven’t tried it yet. But it looks out of control.

Today, she’s back at it. And this time, she’s all about COCONUT OIL COFFEE. 

What???

How to:

  • Black coffee
  • Sweeten to taste (she likes two splenda)
  • 1 – 2 teaspoons coconut oil
  • Blend for a few seconds to allow oil to emulsify

RESULT:  Healthy coconut coffee goodness.

This is life changing.

unspecified-72011

If you love Fat Girls Fitness, subscribe to our bi-weekly newsletter.

(We won’t spam you)

And/or follow Fat Girls Fitness on Facebook 🙂

 

Can a Marijuana Diet Help You Lose Weight?

Ok. I’m a bit suspicious of this. Maybe even paranoid 😉

But I suppose I should read the book before judging.

Reblogged from Vuber Vapes:

A new study revealed that weed/ cannabinoids plays an important role in a person’s digestion. Though the “Marijuana Diet” sound’s enticing, it does not however provide positive results without a proper diet.

The Stoners Cookbook revealed the details on how the diet works. It was mention that “The Marijuana Diet” handbook is something most pot smokers can invest on, wherein they gave tips on how the diet works.

Source: Can a Marijuana Diet Help You Lose Weight?

Spaghetti Squash a la Cousin Diana

This recipe arriveth at Fat Girls Fitness via text message from my cousin Diana.

Cousin Diana is a medical doctor!! So you punks better listen up & show her recipe some respect.

IMG_3398
Spaghetti Squash? Or an actual photo of your mammary glands?

You’ll need:

  • one spaghetti squash
  • 2 tbsp olive oil
  • 1 tomato (diced)
  • minced garlic
  • shaved parmesan
  • Optional: 1 or 2 slices provolone cheese

Instructions: 

  1. Find a spaghetti squash. Where? Beats me. My local shithole doesn’t seem to have any.
  2. Once you find that thing, cut in half, length wise. Also, give me a call and tell me where you found it.
  3. Set oven to 450F
  4. Scoop out seeds
  5. Add the following (per side):
    • one tbsp olive oil
    • minced garlic
    • 1/2 diced tomato
    • shaved parmesan
  6. Bake for 60 minutes
  7. Remove from oven, use two forks to shave squash into spaghetti like strands
  8. Optional: cover w/ one slice of provolone cheese & place back into oven for 10 min.
IMG_3376.JPG
This is what it looks like covered in sweet sweet provolone 🙂

Full disclosure: I haven’t personally tried this recipe just yet.

It’s not that I don’t love my Cousin Diana (really I do!). It’s just that I’ve had  zero success in finding a spaghetti squash ANYWHERE in this godforsaken town.

In any event, it looks good. Like Leonardo DiCaprio good. And I’m told it’s tasty. Like Beyonce tasty.

So I will try it soon.

..And if it sucks, well I’m sorry. Maybe you shouldn’t believe every recipe you read on the internet.

Happy Squashing.

unspecified-7

If you love Fat Girls Fitness, subscribe to our bi-weekly newsletter.

(We won’t spam you)

And/or follow Fat Girls Fitness on Facebook 🙂

 

 

80’s Music Hump Day Playlist

For your listening/work out pleasure:

  • Whitney Houston- I Wanna Dance With Somebody
  • Madonna- Papa Don’t Preach
  • Devo- Whip It
  • Aretha Franklin- I Say A Little Prayer
  • Michael Jackson- The Way You Make Me Feel
  • Techtronic- Pump Up The Jam
  • Pat Benatar- Hit Me With Your Best Shot
  • Prince- Kiss
  • The B-52’s- Love Shack
  • Eurythmics- Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)
  • Survivor- Eye of The Tiger
  • Salt N Pepa- Push It
  • Duran Duran- Hungry Like The Wolf

unspecified-821112111.png

If you love Fat Girls Fitness, subscribe to our bi-weekly newsletter.

(We won’t spam you)

And/or follow Fat Girls Fitness on Facebook 🙂

 

No Gym No Problem: Part 2 Outdoor Edition

Attention: Fit Fam

We have warm weather today! With warm weather comes the inner battle “go to the gym… don’t go to the gym”

Fear no more! Here is an awesome workout you can do outdoors.

I did three sets of 30 with 30 second rest between each move.

  • 30 reverse lunges with overhead resistance band
  • 30 one arm kettle bell row each arm making a total of 60 (work those triceps!)
  • 30 Russian twists
  • 30 walk outs (these are almost as bad as burpees)
  • 30 “box jumps” (I didn’t have a box so I improvised with the curb)
  • 30 overhead lunges (I used a folding chair for weight)

unspecified-8211121111.png

If you love Fat Girls Fitness, subscribe to our bi-weekly newsletter.

(We won’t spam you)

And/or follow Fat Girls Fitness on Facebook 🙂

Women are the Superior Sex

Fotolia_64081997_XS.jpg

Earlier today, I posted about Amelia Earhart.  But on International Women’s Day, one post is never enough.

Because in honor of this special day, I need to come clean: 
I am 100% convinced that Women are the superior sex.

Not equal, but better. And measurably so. Now before you call me a feminist bitch, two points:

  1. It’s not particularly important to me to be a member of the superior sex. I have no dog in this fight. But facts are facts. We’re a little bit better, on average, than dudes.  Dudes, on the other hand, are the absolute worst.
  2. I am not a feminist. REPEAT: I am not a feminist. I just happen to think women are better than men in most ways.

Reasoning:

  1. I hate every man on public transportation.

If you are an XY, and you’re on public transportation, then you probably fall into one of the following categories (and most likely more than one):

  • You smell;
  • You take up too much space;
  • you rap at me; OR
  • you ogle.

On the Problem of Man Spreading

What the fucking fuck? Man spreading has gotten so bad on the NY subway system, that the MTA has spent the past two years campaigning to discourage it.

Let me put it this way. MTA could be spending those funds on oh umm…..AIR CONDITIONING in those sweltering Summer months? Or how about cleaning up urine? (Which come to think of it, is also the fault of men.)

But NO. The MTA can’t waste a single penny solving actual problems. And that’s because men take up such an extraordinary amount of space with their stupid hairy legs that every last penny must be spent just trying to cope with this oddly specific problem.

I will never believe that your most treasured appendage is so overwhelmingly large that you just HAVE to take up three seats. Just close your legs, and assert your dominance elsewhere.

If I were King, all of the subway systems could afford air conditioning because man spreading would be a capital offense.  Chocolate would also be free for everyone.

On rap

I thoroughly enjoy rap music. But I don’t enjoy being rapped at.

…Well actually I kind of do. But in any event, it’s impolite.

I have NEVER been rapped at by a woman. Women don’t rap AT people, they rap WITH people. Because women are not monsters. And men are the devil.

2. Women have better social intelligence.

Which isn’t hard. Because most men have a whopping zero percent.

79b54bdbd799c025efdbc46e7ac027205f52fa8231853db4ee77739f79dbe15d.jpg
Oprah knows.

3. Women see gray areas.

I’ve always suspected that women are better at detecting nuance than men. Men have no idea about this. Probably because they are so incredibly shitty at detecting nuance.

But I’m not the only one who feels this way. Here is a scientific source.

meme
men understand nothing.

4. Women have all the uteri.

That’s right, fools. All of them.

We can freeze dry your sperm, but just TRY to freeze dry my uterus. It won’t work. And I will send you straight to jail if you even think about it.

5. Men Lose Weight Faster

Admittedly, this one doesn’t make women superior. I’m just including it because it makes me that fucking mad.

Like goddammit guys, the irony of this.  No one even cares if you’re skinny. We mostly just care about how much money you make.

You dudes, on the other hand, care so much. In fact when it comes to attractiveness, you prioritize thinness over any other feature. And it’s not even your fault. You were just born this way. As total baby douchebags.

Zen Moments

Phew. I’m sorry boys. That little rant felt so good.

I guess International Women’s Day doesn’t require man bashing, but hey sometimes these things happen.

And I guess it’s not necessary for one sex to be superior to the other.

…But it just so happens that mine is. #girlpower

unspecified-7

If you love Fat Girls Fitness, subscribe to our bi-weekly newsletter.

(We won’t spam you)

And/or follow Fat Girls Fitness on Facebook 🙂

Five Ways to Be Like Amelia on Int’l Women’s Day

1dc8beb5bef53c2a803c722d6ee4297d.jpg

 

Amelia Earhart = perhaps the most badass person who ever lived on this planet. 

There is so much we can learn from her on International Women’s Day.

1. Do what can’t be done. 

Everything that “can’t be done” actually can be done. It just hasn’t been done yet.  So don’t strive to “be cool” ; strive to “create cool”

  • Being cool means being an early adopter of things that society is already opening up to.
  • Creating cool means doing things fearlessly.

Creating cool makes you a pioneer. It might mean doing things that your friends and family deem reckless. That’s because most people can’t FATHOM living without the fear of other people’s opinions.

 

d7e879c2e85eb583628591d92c646073

2.  Don’t complain about getting no respect. Demand it.  

In Earhart’s day, getting married often meant the end of your identity as an individual human being.  Earhart didn’t bitch and moan about this. She simply refused to let it happen to her.

When a George Putnam wanted to put a ring on it, Amelia was down.

But Amelia was no “ride or die” chick. Because even though she truly wanted to hit it, Amelia agreed only to a trial period at first.

She would agree to a marriage ONLY if he would agree to respect her separate identity. Bitch demanded respect, and so respect was given. And they lived happily together until her disappearance.

aad64252fbb30739477906e1faceb45f
The original Nike spokesperson

3. Don’t hush yourself.

“Women, like men, should try to do the impossible. And when they fail, their failure should be a challenge to others.” – Amelia Earhart

According to this Mental Floss article, Earhart wrote for Cosmopolitan. But not about topics that most would have found acceptable back in the 1920’s.

In total, she publish 16 published articles. The titles of which include:

  • “Shall You Let Your Daughter Fly?”; AND
  • “Why Are Women Afraid to Fly?”

4. Never Box Yourself In.  

Did you know Amelia Earhart had a fashion line?

..Just because you are a badass pilot, doesn’t mean you can’t look great.

People fear the unpredictable. If they can’t box you in, they’ll keep trying. But don’t let them box you in. And don’t box yourself in. Opportunities are everywhere.

5. Please Yourself. 

quote-i-want-to-do-it-because-i-want-to-do-it-amelia-earhart-55064.jpg

Amelia Earhart was a completely unique human being. A pilot, a pioneer, a writer, a fashion designer, a wife – she was so multi-faceted.

Amelia had a decidedly androgynous flair for the time, and yet was entirely comfortable with her womanhood and femininity.

She didn’t feel the need to please YOU, whoever you happened to be. She felt the need to please herself. And she did it because she wanted to do it.

Wishing you a happy (and empowered) International Women’s Day!

unspecified-7

If you love Fat Girls Fitness, subscribe to our bi-weekly newsletter.

(We won’t spam you)

And/or follow Fat Girls Fitness on Facebook 🙂